The Amazing Shrinking Belly of Mr. Beer Belly

I’m Rattling!

By on April 27, 2014 in Life with 0 Comments

I'm Rattling!

Have you been into a health food store recently? I was in one this morning and I was the fattest guy in the store. That’s what I like about travelling to places like Chicago. I’m thin over there.

The store by my house is run by these thin shaky people. Not quite hippies and not quite meth-heads. I think they live on Red Bulls and Dexatrim.

Continue Reading »

I Talk to Myself

By on April 26, 2014 in Life with 0 Comments

I Talk to Myself

I talk to myself.

Before you ask me to step away from the sharp objects on my desk, you do too!

See? You are doing it right now.

Continue Reading »

Mr. Beer Belly vs. Mr. Cheese

By on April 25, 2014 in Life with 0 Comments

Chuck E. Cheese's

Earlier this evening, after eating my salad and chicken breast, I found myself sitting in Chuck E. Cheese’s with my nephew and family.

Hmmm… a restaurant (yes, I use that term loosely) with a rodent as its mascot?!

Ah, but I digress.

Suddenly, in comes the family from hell.

Continue Reading »

Finders Kippers

By on April 24, 2014 in Food with 0 Comments


Okay, I’m an old man. I thought I had eaten and drank just about everything available to me in America… but this morning I had kippers for the first time.

“Could we have kippers for breakfast, mummy dear, mummy dear?” — Supertramp

Continue Reading »